But first let me apologize…

I was out with some friends the other night and made a passing comment about someone who walked by us. I was swiftly reprimanded by one of my friends who said, “we will not be body shaming anyone that is unacceptable.” I hadn’t even realized that was what I did until she had said it. The type of comment I had made was one that I had heard my whole life made whispered about people we would see in passing.

We may not realize the impact we have on people with the words we say. The meaning of our words and/or actions tend to change between what the person talking is saying to what the recipient hears and perceives. I was never the smallest kid, the most athletic, or the smartest and have struggled with this type of language and comments my whole life. These comments can come in many forms and differ for everyone. Sometimes we just think them in our heads and sometimes they end up coming out. We need to realize that it is never okay to say these things and we should work to keep them out of our heads as well.

These habits can be things that we grew up with, formed due to a bad experience, or because we are influenced by the wrong crowd. We, and I am starting with myself here, need to recognize these habits and silence them when they come up. We need to remind ourselves that we don’t know other peoples lives and their stories. It is also none of our business how they take care of themselves, how they dress, or act, etc.

We need to recognize people for what they are, what they do, and how they treat those around them. If a person has a good heart, means well, and is kind to their peers then we should treat them with respect and kindness. We shouldn’t judge them for their differences.

So, to that person that I made the comment about, I apologize. You may not have heard me (and I hope you didn’t), but I have no room to comment, to judge, and I hope you do not take my words to heart. I hope that you know you are special, worthy of goodness and kindness. I will be working so that I don’t make those types of comments again, no one deserves to hear them or think them.

“143” – The number of letters in each word of the phrase ‘I love you.’ 

“But what I hope most of all is that you understand what I mean when I tell you that even though I do not know you, and even though I may never meet you, laugh with you, cry with you, or kiss you. I love you. With all my heart, I love you.” – Alan Moore, V for Vendetta


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